Resilience is rooted in adaptive behaviour and science. The advances in neuroscience in the last decade have allowed a better understanding of why some people develop the adaptive capacities to overcome significant adversity and others do not.
Which one are you – coping or non-coping?
There are many forms of adversity in childhood, but all adversity can be overcome if a child has a supportive parent, caregiver, or another adult. This combination of family or friends’ support helps develop positive experiences, which constitute the foundations of resilience. They enable a child to develop personal character strengths, which allows them to respond to adversity and thrive eventually. Learning to cope with manageable threats to our physical, emotional, and social well-being is critical for developing resilience.
Resilience is the capacity to continue and develop positive behaviours following adversity at a behavioural level.
Adversity = Difficult or unpleasant situation
There is no clear roadmap letting us know what we will experience in life, but adversity is guaranteed. For example, who has not experienced the death of a loved one, a life-altering accident, work stress, a severe illness, or just getting older. Each change affects people differently. We all hate uncertainty, especially those pesky, fearful thoughts-forms that uncertainty and adversity create in our minds. They are sometimes described as the ‘chattering monkey’. But having resilience helps us overcome the negativity associated with fearful thoughts and perceived negative experiences – so as you get older, start to embrace life’s adversities. We need to be aware that the road to resilience will likely involve considerable emotional distress, but that makes us stronger and better. So, stop being the victim, or OK, we are all allowed to be the victim for a short time, but then we must sort ourselves out and move on. Resilience is the key, and adversity is part of the process.
If you would like to speak with a counsellor about how we can support you, please contact us.
Find out more about Liz here
Is learning to be resilient a positive life experience? – Yes!